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Seffrican computer terms (we'll need them after the rolling blackouts)

  • Monitor - keeping an eye on the braai.
  • Download - get the firewood off the bakkie.
  • Hard drive - trip back home without any cold beer.
  • Keyboard - where you hang the bakkie and bike keys.
  • Window - what you shut when it's cold.
  • Screen - what you shut in the mosquito season.
  • Byte - what mosquitoes do.
  • Bit - what mosquitoes did.
  • Megabyte - what mosquitoes at the water hole do.
  • Chip - a bar snack.
  • Microchip - what's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips.
  • Modem -what you did to the lawns.
  • Dot Matrix - Oom Jan Matrix's wife.
  • Laptop - where the cat sleeps.
  • Software - plastic knives and forks you get at KFC.
  • Hardware - real stainless steel knives and forks from Checkers.
  • Mouse - what eats the grain in the shed.
  • Mainframe - what holds the shed up.
  • Web - what spiders make.
  • Web site - the shed (or under the verandah).
  • Cursor - the old bloke that swears a lot.
  • Search engine - what you do when the bakkie won't go.
  • Yahoo - what you say when the bakkie does go.
  • Upgrade - a steep hill.
  • Server - the person at the pub what brings out the lunch.
  • Mail Server - the bloke at the pub what brings out the lunch.
  • User - the neighbour what keeps borrowing things.
  • Network - when you have to repair your fishing net.
  • Internet - complicated fish net repair method.
  • Netscape - when fish maneuvers out of reach of net.
  • Online - when you get the laundry hung out.
  • Offline - when the pegs don't hold the washing up.


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